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Jozma007

All Hail ME!
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Have you ever been lied to?  Have you ever confided in someone and then had all your dirty laundry hung out to dry in full view of the neighborhood?  Have you ever told someone something really, and I mean REALLY important, just to find it written on every wall in gigantic block letters for the world to see?  And here I thought high school was over.
This is good research for my writing I suppose.  Now I can delve into the deep dark pools that are my characters' emotions when they are betrayed.  Now I'll know how they feel when a "friend" stabs them in the back.  I will understand the humiliation and anger they feel, and the desire to seek out revenge when they realize that they've been screwed over.  This will help my writing.  
This can be a good thing right?
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Vanity

2 min read
Wow am I vain!  I just realized how many mirrors I have in my new place, and how many I haven't even unpacked yet.  And yet I feel the need to buy even bigger ones.  I'm getting rather irritated with myself actually.  Last night I watched The Labyrinth and now I want to commission a portrait of myself as the Goblin Queen!  What is wrong with me?!  I did the same thing with Pirates and LOTR!  And The Muppet Show.  If I had it my way I would plaster the walls of my house with full length mirrors and portraits of myself.  Even thinking about the way my house would look if I did that makes me salivate ever so slightly.  I would be so happy if I lived in a house with my image everywhere.  Admittedly it would be a teeny bit creepy, and I may or may not go crazy and begin talking to myself, so to speak, but I'm willing to take that chance.  And THAT makes me disgusted with myself.  I don't want to be one of those crazy chicks that writes herself into fan fiction stories.  But it seems like I'm headed in that direction.  Someone SAVE ME FROM MYSELF!!
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Poetry

1 min read
Wow, it's been so long since I wrote poetry, I almost  had forgotten how.  I think the last poem I wrote was in 8th grade.  It was an Ode to Carriere I believe.  Oh!  I should post those on here! That would be a kick.  Oh wait, there was that one poem I wrote in my dad's birthday card, but that didn't go so well.  Anyways, ya I wrote a short little poem tonight.  Only 3 stanzas, but WOW did it feel good.  It's a bit of a downer, since I'm in an absolutely shit mood, but I think it's powerful nonetheless.  I feel down but. . . accomplished.  That's kinda nice.  Still wanna rock back and forth in a corner for a while, but I'll refrain from doing so until tomorrow.  I need some sleep.  
Nighty night.
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Sigh

2 min read
Sometimes I make myself sad.  I feel like I'm just repeating everything over and over and over again.   I make the same face in all my pictures, I draw people for the same angle every time, and all my story ideas are starting to sound the same.  And if I come up with something that I think is different, someone else has already done it.  Are there no good ideas left in the world?  Has everything just been done to death?  I used to feel original, but now I see girls walking around with mohawks and I can't help but think, "Am I just another shaved head in the crowd?"  
So now I'm just sitting here, watching TV, because I can't think of anything original to write.  I should just look in the mirror for an hour.  That always makes me feel better.  I could look at myself in the mirror forever.  Can you tell I'm losing my mind?  I don't know what's wrong with me.  I write about 18 pages of a story with all the zeal you can imagine, and then I lose steam and it never goes anywhere.  I swear I have at least 30 stories on my laptop that will probably never be finished because I just can't write much more than the first 18 pages.  And I can't figure out why!  They're all the same!  I may as well just write one ending, change the names, and copy and paste into each one.  It makes me sick of myself.  
I'll perk up in a month or two.  I'm just in a downward spiral at the moment.  YAY.  :-(  But there's light at the end of the tunnel.  One day I'll finish a story.  Some day.  Maybe. . . Whatever.   
I need something new in my life.  I need to go somewhere (outside North America) like I did in 2009.  I need to experience new things and people of other cultures.  My trip to Europe inspired me.  I should do that again.  If only I could afford such things.  Well I suppose I have Egypt to look forward to after I get my degree.  
Sigh. . .  I'm going to bed.
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So drunk am I.  How drunk am I?  Let's say 5 or 6 (I lost count) paralyzers drunk.  Pardon the spelling mistakes by the way.  What is the reason for my drunkenness?  Well initially it was because tonight is girl's night, but then my ex drama started going dpwn and the alcohol just made things seem funnier and funnier.  Why things should seem funny while my ex is spilling his guts I have no idea, but I find it entertaining all the same.  Maybe its the vodka.  Of course my roommate put too much ice in my drink, but that's besides the point.  
Today I learned that someone added the 3rd chapter of my Witches of Oakburn story to their "favorites".  Now I have a question.  Why would somebody only add the 3rd chapter and not all the rest?  How will they read them in succession over and over again like a beloved novel should be read?  ADD THEM ALL!!  I really hope this person didn't read only the 3rd chapter.  That would make me very VERY sad for all of humanity.  And yet  only have one Watcher.   Hello RJ.   I still wanna break your jaw my lovely friend.  And I say that with all the vodka induced love I have in my blood stream.  But as a side note, I love having a Watcher.  Makes me feel special.  
My dog skypesd me the other day.   I heard my laptop going off with that skype ringy thing and I answered.  All I saw was this big, wet, black nose in the camera and my gramma saying,  "Get off!  You're not a lapdog!!"  Turns out, Sixx jumped on Gramma and then stepped on the mouse, and hece skyped me!  Is that not the coolest thing ever?!
I'm also pretending I'm Envy Adams right now and singing Black Sheep.  
So the point of this entry is. . . . I AM AWESOME.  Every man in this town wants me, I've got the best dog in the world, and my roommate just walked into a wall!  
Peace Out
All Hail Queen Jessa
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Featured

With Friends Like These by Jozma007, journal

Vanity by Jozma007, journal

Poetry by Jozma007, journal

Sigh by Jozma007, journal

Drunken Shenanigans by Jozma007, journal